$#*! My Dad (and I) Says

In light of recent events, a Colvin House Swear Jar has been established. Yet, the only Colvins being taunted with this negative incentative are me–for obvious reasons–and my dad. At first, it was more for me, but then I guess my dad felt bad and didn’t want me to suffer by myself.

Mom set up the rules:
1. Each time a potty-word “slips out”, ten cents are put into the Jar
2. That especially bad word (flying…) costs double
3. The monitors are everyone except my dad and me
4. Sign language counts as well (thanks for teaching me some ASL Kiefer)

So far, I think I owe $.70, which really isn’t that bad considering that it’s been just two days. Either I’m really good at catching myself or I’m very sneaky and quiet. I think it’s a little bit of both. But everyone is convinced that I will be broke soon and I will have to start carrying around rolls of dimes. Let’s see about that!

And there could possibly be corruption within this system. By naming Jenna a monitor of my language, she could potentially wrongly accuse me of cursing out of spite. After all, she is my little bratty sister with intentions to make my life miserable and enjoying every step of it. And also, does it count if I stub my toe? Naturally, a “bad” word will come out. That’s just the way people react to sudden, earth-shattering pain.

But this is all for a good cause. We established that whomever wins, gets the prize of selecting a charity or organization to donate the money. When I win, I’m going to donate the money to Beckman’s Mock Trial fund. That way, parking fees don’t have to be paid for and they can actually get T-shirts next year. To achieve that, I will make my dad really mad, thus forcing him to deposit mula into the Jar.

But in all seriousness, I do see what my parents are trying to achieve by threatening my wealth. Choice words are not always appreciated by some and they can determine one’s opinion of me. At first, I was completely reluctant to agree to see it from their perspective. But now, not only do I understand, I will comply with what they are asking. I will never know if someone is turned off by a colorful language so it’s important to gague how others will react to it. I know everyone curses, but I guess I’m just not in the enviornment where it is accepted by all.

So for now, the objective is to tone it down a little. But don’t be surprised if I ask you for some change.

Clearly there are some things wrong with this picture. First, I know for a fact that Dad owes more than 0. Second, the Colvin House Swear Jar isn't even a jar.


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